April 13, 2004
Attendees:
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Rosemary Allen |
Mike Anderson |
Diane Carson |
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Natalie Dean |
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Toni Graffia |
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Mae Jensen |
Bear Ketzler |
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Karen Lord |
Nita Marks |
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Moses Paul |
Bonnie Reed |
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Margaret Sanders |
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Note: If you see that the name of someone who attended this meeting is missing from the above list please let us know so that the minutes can be corrected. The attendees names are taken from the sign-in sheet located on the table near the door. Please take a moment to sign in and remind others to do so. The attendance of those who did not sign-in may be overlooked. Also, please make sure your signature is legible. In order to qualify for some funding sources accurate records of attendance at our meetings is required.
LOCATION: Nenana Senior’s Center. Meal provided by
TIME: Meeting Convened at
WELCOME: by
PRAYER: Prayer by Bonnie Reed, followed with the Pledge of Allegiance
APPROVAL OF MINUTES AND AGENDA:
Agenda - The agenda was reviewed and approved.
Minutes -The minutes were also approved; additional corrections may be emailed to Paul V.
VISTORS/GUEST SPEAKERS:
Natalie Dean -
Karen Lord - Nenana Native Council, Headstart Program
Moses Paul - Tochaket Inc.
INTRODUCTIONS:
None needed (all speakers are local residents)
Natalie Dean
Youth Summer Employment
Natalie D - I’ve passed out a list of jobs that could be done by the teens for the summer. Our community needs adult input for this program to succeed. I am working on setting up as many programs as I can in order to provide jobs for as many young people in our community as want to work. I’ve passed out a one page document with ideas that I’ve come up with and am looking for suggestions for other ways to employ kids and for help from others who are willing to assist me. I have access to grants with which we can pay kids to work part time a various businesses around town if people are willing to agree to that.
Margaret S - The Ice Classic is looking for someone or a group to plant and care for the flowers in front of the
Bear K. - Native council (in conjunction with TCC) hires several kids each summer on a summer jobs program. Applications are due by Friday, April 16th. Available jobs could be at the
Natalie D - There were eight seniors from
Milt H - We could take one person to work part-time at our office.
Paul V - The court system has done that in the past and I suspect that if you approached them they would consider doing it again (especially if they didn’t have to come up with any of the money). We might even be able to take two or three if you spaced them out or staggered their hours. Of course they would have to be able to maintain confidentiality.
Rose V - Railbelt would be willing to do job shadowing too (again as long as the confidentiality issue is addressed).
Margaret S - We don’t have any money but if you do and you have kids who need to work we can always use help at the Senior’s Center.
Margaret S - The Visitor’s Center is another place that you might want to contact.
Rose A - The legislature usually hires two kids each year too. You might want to check with them.
Diane C - I know a person who needs farm help each year.
Natalie D - That could happen under a rent-a-kid bureau type program that I am also willing to blend in with this but is not really a part of it.
Bear K - Native Council will be hiring two older kids (18+) this summer - one as an environmental technician and another to do community cleanup. There is training available for these positions.
Natalie D - CyberLynx will also be hiring two older kids this summer (18+) - kids who can comply with confidentiality laws.
Milt H - Yutana allows community members to attend their Haz-Mat training each year. That might be a good thing for an older kid to go through as a means of getting into a field that pays well. You might want to talk to Endil about it.
Natalie D - What about Community Work Service (volunteer work), should we require that some of the work they do be on a volunteer basis without pay? Some programs require that - other’s don’t. What should we do?
Milt H - Some kids have to earn six to eight thousand dollars by fall for college. It would be hard for them to do that and do volunteer work.
Paul V - New legislation being introduced would require anyone who gets federal assistance or loans to perform a certain amount of volunteer work or they are not eligible for the assistance. Perhaps we could require a small amount all the way through. It would end up being significant but wouldn’t be a lot at once.
Bear K - It would be nice if the community would get together for fundraisers to raise money for area students that may need money for college. This could be held in trust as scholarship money. We do a lot of fund raisers here in town. If these kids need to raise that much money for college maybe we could help them out by doing some education fund raisers. We could do some BBQ’s or auctions, etc. Native Council would be willing to donate the food.
Margaret S - Native council may not even need to donate the food. Ever since the
Karen Lord
Head Start program
I’ve been looking into the advisability of starting a Head Start Program in Nenana and have been going house to house to ask everyone if they know about Head Start or would like to know more about Head Start. Then I share what Head Start is all about and what options could be available for children in our community. I’m looking for parents with children from birth to five years of age to get an estimate of children eligible for this program. So far it appears that over 40 children would be eligible. I have a complete list of who I’ve talked to, the questions I asked, and responses I’ve received while visiting with them. This assessment is due by the 23rd.
There are three options available. They are a center based program, a home based program and an options based program. An additional possibility would be a drop off center where parents could drop off their children and the kids could stay there for a fee and it would be run like a day care.
Thirteen people have said that they would agree to be on the Parent Committee for this program and I’m still taking names to be on this committee.
Sarah Kuenzil, the director of Head Start for TCC, will be in Nenana
The Head Start program is one that requires heavy parental involvement.
Nita M volunteered to serve on the committee.
Moses Paul
Youth and Grandparent program
Moses P - In 1991-92 Paul V and myself and some others got together and established Tochaket Inc. At the time we talked about some programs that we weren’t able to get going then but would still like to get going in Nenana. We would like to see the youth get together with the elders of our community in a natural setting and pass along some of our traditional ways - a program to help keep the traditional activities going in Nenana. Perhaps we could start a youth camp and fish camp and an activities area near
Mike A - Getting kids with adults out into the country together sounds a lot like scouting. As a youth I was involved in scouting and attained the rank of Eagle Scout, some of my sons have too, perhaps we could get scouting going here in town. There is also a program called Explores for older youth that could tie in very nicely with what is being proposed. There may be young adults in our area interested in this program as well as the younger kids. It might also be a good idea to consider putting them in contact with a search and rescue program.
Paul V - Milt and I just talked to Ken Eggleston (the superintendent at the
Rose A - This is the kind of thing that all of us should be able to be involved in. I would love to get out there and help with something like this and I suspect that a lot of others would too.
Kat M - There is a lot of focus on culture camps at present by rural providers. This could fit into a culture camp and we may be able to get some funding for it.
Natalie D - We did a program in Kotzebue called “It takes guts to learn” where kids got together with elders and learned from them the life cycle of animals by investigating the stomach contents of various animals at different times of the year. The program operated year around and got kids and elders out into the country. Perhaps we could model something on that program.
Bear K - This issue of getting kids together with the elders out in the wilderness was discussed at some length last year by native council and I was given the directive to implement something. We own property down river and discussed developing an overnight or day camp of some sort. It was just a matter of getting to it and having something to do. This sounds like what we talked about so we should be able to help provide some funding for it.
Roy S - There is already a program at the school where the teens are learning to build small portable cabins. We already have three of them built. There is a grant for this program and we may be able to help with the kind of program that Mo is proposing by taking the cabins out to the lake and setting them up as well as making other improvements.
Crucial Conversations
Paul presented a review he did on a book called Crucial Conversations. It is the #32 best seller nationwide in its category at present. It talks about how we communicate with people when crucial conversations come up. It defines Crucial Conversations as those where 1) Opinions Vary, 2) Emotions Run Strong, and 3) the Stakes are High. In such situations do we take the typical approach of using silence or violence? There are learnable skills that help us take a more healthy approach in such situations. These skills help us to overcome our fear of engaging in dialog about important subjects and producing beneficial results. It takes effort on our part to learn the skills and we need to change ourselves instead of trying to change everyone else. All communities are full of different opinions. Communities that learn how to listen to each other and engage in healthy dialog will accomplish much more than those that don’t. He handed out a four page summary of the first chapter and it is included with these minutes as an attachment.
REPORTS/OLD BUSINESS/NEW BUSINESS
There was no old business, new business, or reports made.
OPEN FLOOR FOR COMMENTS/QUESTIONS/DISCUSSION
Bear Ketzler - NNC
SAMSA Grant
A month or so ago I put in four names from Nenana for people to attend a training class on this grant. I just heard from then and the training is scheduled in
Housing
The Tribe has approved for us to build houses in Nenana for Edna Ketzler, Lily Henry, Margaret Sanders, and to finish the rebuilding of Anna Starr’s house because the insurance money was not enough to replace it.
Alcohol lawsuit
The council has approved for us to proceed with a lawsuit against the alcohol industry with one condition - we must involve other tribes. Product liability may be the basis for the suit. The idea is to make the industry take responsibility for the tremendous human suffering that has been inflicted upon the native people through the use of their products. It will require the involvement of a very large law firm, will cost millions of dollars and is likely to take years to resolve. What will be end result of such a suit? With the Tobacco Industry, the states received the settlement and filtered it down to non-profit organizations within their states. If something similar should happen in this case, should we be looking into establishing a non-profit organization to deal with spending the funds in a way to implement the corrective measures that we demand?
Education
On May 7th there will be a private reception at UAF for Jack Coghill and Al Ketzler Sr. to receive honorary doctorate degrees. There will also be a public reception on Sat May 8th at the David Solomon Hall from
In addition, several members of our wellness coalition will be graduating from certificated programs at UAF. They are Lois Law,
Auntie’s House
I’ve passed out a one page document about Auntie’s House location options. They include the Salmon Bake, the Cultural Center, the Corner Bar, the Hobson House or the Suckling House (additional possible locations added during the meeting included the Tripod Motel, and a few other residences that have recently come up for sale locally) Some of these have up front costs and some would involve a renovation cost. The Auntie’s House committee has agreed to meet right after next week’s meeting to go around and look at the properties.
Gaming
Shawna Burk has been hired to head the Gaming Commission for the Tribes new Bingo program in Nenana. Now they will need to find a location to hold this event. There are various bingo supplies from the past at the
Diane C - What about people who can’t handle gambling and end up spending the last of their kids lunch money playing bingo?
Bear K - That’s been talked about and it was decided that we’d have a better chance of dealing with such problems if we have local gaming than the way it is now where people go up to Fairbanks and do what you are talking about and we have no way of knowing about it.
River Bank Erosion
The Tribe is going to use their van to bring interested people to the city of
Consolidation of Services
Several communities in
Milt Haken - Nenana Police Services
Improvements to the Police Department
Milt H - Greg Russell has been in Nenana looking at the police facilities and will send back his proposal of any improvements or changes that he thinks will help the city and the police department in this area.
DUI Prevention
There is money available to put into a new prevention program for teaching the youth in Nenana and surrounding area about drunk driving. This would include the purchase of a go-cart called S.I.D.N.E.
It simulates the reactions of drunk drivers behind the wheel of a car. Paul V and I discussed it with Superintendent Ken Eggleston at the school and he is very supportive of moving ahead to implement the program.
E.V.O.C Training
The Fairbanks Police Dept. and several other police departments are meeting all wee here in Nenana and are using the
D.A.R.E Training
I just finished the DARE training program at
Drug Recognition Expert (DRE) Training
I’ve been selected to go to
Less than lethal response
The Nenana Police Dept wants to reduce the likelihood of someone being killed in an encounter with police that requires the use of firearms. We need another shotgun that shoots ‘bean bags’ at people when shots have to be fired. Sixty four percent of all cases where shootings occur have been deemed to have been unnecessary but decisions had to be made in split seconds. It would be nice if the shootings did not result in death. These shotguns accomplish that. We are in the process of attempting to acquire another one. We are just about finished with re-inventorying our evidence room and may be able to dispose of some evidence at auction or otherwise that will help us obtain one.
Sober Dance
We want to have another sober dance in June.
Bear K - Rough Woods Inn is planning on closing off
HAPPENINGS
Free Dump Day
Free dump day at Denali Borough will be May 15 this year.
Memorial Day
On May 15th there will be a wreath making activity open to all ages in preparation for Memorial Day at the tribal offices.
Local Emergency Planning Commission (LEPC)
LAPC will be meeting at the
Nenana Strategic Planning Committee (NSPC)
NSPC will be meeting at the
FAS Training
There will be Fetal Alcohol training at the Tribal Hall on April 22nd and 23rd. It will consist of a 14 hour training class which is free for those who wish to attend. College credit can be received for this course. Contact
Beading Circle
A beading circle will be held every Wed @
Mike Anderson will officiate the next meeting Tuesday April 20.
NEXT MEETING DATE/TIME/CHAIRPERSON/GUEST SPEAKERS/SUBJECTS
Margaret Wilson will be attending the wellness meeting at
Mike Anderson has agreed to chair next week’s meeting.
ADJOURNMENT
Meeting adjourned at
Minutes respectfully submitted by Diane Carson and
AGENDA
WELCOME
(By this week’s chairperson).
PRAYER
(Remind people about the prayer list near the sign-in sheet)
(To be said by next volunteer on the prayer list)
PLEDGE OF ALLEGIENCE
(Remain standing after prayer for this)
REMINDER TO SIGN IN
(Important for accuracy of minutes and for funding)
PRESENTATION OF AGENDA AND CALL FOR MODIFICATIONS
(If no modifications are offered agenda will be deemed accepted)
APPROVAL OF LAST WEEK’S MINUTES
(If no corrections are offered minutes will be deemed accepted but late corrections can still be emailed to Paul V.)
ANNOUNCEMENTS/UPDATES
(This should be moved to AFTER guest speakers on weeks with full agendas in which case the announcements need to be limited to a few minutes each)
Native Council
City Schools
City of
Chief of Police
Railbelt Mental Health and Addictions
Ch’eghutsen’
Seniors
Chamber of Commerce
Ice Classic
Assembly of
Other Churches
Yutana Barge Lines
Other Businesses
Other Organizations
Visitors
General Public
GUEST SPEAKERS
OLD BUSINESS
NEW BUSINESS
OPEN FLOOR FOR COMMENTS/QUESTIONS/DISCUSSION
HAPPENINGS
NEXT MEETING DATE/TIME/CHAIRPERSON/GUEST SPEAKERS/SUBJECTS
ADJOURNMENT
An Introduction to the book
Crucial Conversations*
Definition
Crucial Conversations are defined as: a discussion between two or more people where
(1) Opinions vary,
(2) Stakes are high, and
(3) Emotions run strong.
People avoid them
How do most people deal with crucial conversations? They avoid them! They avoid them because almost everyone has had one or more crucial conversations and they usually turn out bad.
They’re easy to spot
Everyone who has ever had a crucial conversation turn out bad learns from experience how to spot them - and boy can people spot them. We’ve all been there. We’re in a group, everyone is comfortable with each other and the conversation has changed from one subject to another many times. People are laughing and telling jokes when all of the sudden someone asks or says something that brings all of the elements of a crucial conversation together - and instantly everything changes. Almost instantly people’s ears perk up, they swallow and things go quiet. It’s like the making of a tornado. All the needed ingredients come together and suddenly a tornado forms.
We have no instinctive skills to protect ourselves from them
Unfortunately, as humans, we are not pre-wired to handle crucial conversations in a logical and constructive way. In fact our hardwiring for such things is identical to the way we are wired for danger. We sense danger and immediately our system triggers an adrenaline rush that gets us ready for fight or flight.
Our “fight or flight” programming decreases clear thinking
In the process our body shunts blood from organs that it considers non-essential to fight or flight and one of those organs happens to be our brain – the very organ that could be most helpful in the middle of a crucial conversation. Blood is taken from our brain and from our digestive system (which is why we get a ‘pit’ in our stomach) and gets sent to our lungs and our muscles. We often find our hands balled up into a fist without even realizing that we clenched them.
Avoiding them may be good in war but not in relationships
Those kind of responses might be exactly the right ones if we happen to be at war and talking to the enemy when the discussion instantly changes into a crucial conversation – but they are not the right ones when we are at a backyard party with a group of our friends, or in a board meeting with our colleagues, or at home talking to our spouse. And yet that is exactly where crucial conversations most often pop up.
Avoidance prolongs and worsens the problem
It is true that many of us do “run” from such situations, metaphorically speaking, in that we immediately attempt to change the conversation - but avoiding these conversations or handling them poorly is often the very thing that causes ‘disasters’ in our relationships and that is exactly why we fear them so much.
There are teachable skills – but only if we’re willing to change
So the question arises “Is there a way to handle crucial conversations, and deal with the critical issues that they often represent, in a way that preserves or even improves our relationships”? The answer is, Yes, and they are teachable skills that we can learn - if we are willing to put in the time and effort that is necessary for learning them, and if we are willing to change ourselves rather than trying to change others.
Extremely valuable skill
Is it worth the effort? Many of us have seen, at one time or another, someone who knows how to handle crucial conversations in just the way they ought to be handled. Somehow they do or say just the right things and almost immediately the tension dissolves and people can be heard to exhale in a sigh of relief. When it happens we often say to ourselves “Wow”. At those moments when things take a turn for the better and problems get resolved we can easily see just how valuable such skills are.
This skill is found in all successful organizations and relationships
A study of 500 extremely successful businesses revealed that their success had very little to do with forms, procedures or policies that drive performance management. It all came down to how people handled crucial conversations. Successful people, organizations, relationships, careers, and communities share the ability to talk openly about high stakes, emotional and controversial topics.
It even helps our communities
As people learn how to master their high stakes discussions they also vitalize their organizations and their communities. The difference between the best communities, and the good or the worst, is not the number of problems they have. All communities face problems. The difference is how they deal with those problems. In the best communities key individuals and groups find a way to engage in healthy dialog. In contrast, communities that fail to enter and remain in healthy dialog spend their time at community meetings insulting one another, becoming indignant, and acting as if individuals with differing views are sick or deranged and battles ensue.
It frees us from fear
Learning such skills makes it so that people don’t have to choose between being honest and being effective. People who routinely hold crucial conversations and hold them well are able to express controversial and even risky opinions in a way that gets heard. Their bosses, peers and others listen without becoming defensive and angry.
How people disagree is important
Most people say that “differences of opinion” is what causes most breakups, but everyone in a relationship argues about important issues and yet not everyone breaks up. That’s because it’s how they argue – not that they do argue - that matters.
People fall into three categories
Most people fall into three categories –
- those whose discussions digress into threats and name calling,
- those who revert to silent fuming, and
- those who speak openly, honestly, and effectively.
Over time, those who learn how to state their opinions about high stake, controversial, and emotional issues honestly and respectfully remain together. Those who don’t, split up.
It improves not only our emotional, but also our physical, and mental health
In a most revealing study people who had a life-threatening disease were broken into two groups. One group met weekly for six weeks and was taught specific communication skills; the other group was not taught these skills. Those who learned how to express themselves effectively had a higher survival rate – only 9 percent succumbed as opposed to 30 percent in the untrained group. That is a two thirds decrease in the death rate! Why? When we hold in negative feelings and endure the emotional pain that results from the crucial conversations that we worry about avoiding or miserably fail at having it eats away at our health. In some cases the results are relatively minor but over time they often result in weakened immune systems and declining health.
Our personal problems affect our communities
Our private behavior affects our communities as well. This is most clearly demonstrated by the tragic statistic that most people in prison are not career criminals who were born into a horrible family, then shaped by abuse and neglect into a seething sociopath. In fact, over half of the people who are convicted of violent crimes are first-time offenders who commit crimes against friends or loved ones.
There are good people who didn’t know how to effectively resolve their problems
Most of these people once held a job, paid their bills, and remembered their friends’ birthdays. Then one day, after allowing unresolved problems to build up and then boil over, they attacked a friend, loved one, or neighbor. Since they didn’t know what to say or how to say it they opted for force. This tendency to run from, and inability to work through, tough issues devastates individuals, ruins families, and poisons communities.
How is our community being affected?
What crucial issues does our community face? Are there conversations that we are not holding (or not holding well) that keep us from progressing as much as we could? Do our community meetings at times look more like the Jerry Springer show than an energetic forum for healthy communication? If so, then we, as individuals, and as a community have a lot to gain by focusing on how to handle high-stakes discussions.
*Crucial Conversations: Tools For Talking When Stakes Are High, Copyright © 2002 by Kerry Patterson, Joseph Grenny, Ron McMillan and Al Switlzer. Published by McGraw-Hill
A Review by